Welcome (once again, for some of you) to Wogworld. After going private a while back (for reasons some of you know and the rest will just have to wonder), we are re-opening to the public! To kick off the new era of Wogworld, here is a little story about what I consider to be the most bewildering social incident in my life:
Let's all jump into the way-back machine and ride it to the spring of 2008. What were you doing then? Never mind, this is about me. I was living in the DC area with D-What, who was nearing the end of Mandarin Chinese language training at the Foreign Service Institute (I had dropped out of the same class in March, unable to keep up while I was also working nearly full time at the World Market at Pentagon Row – but still tested with a 1+/0+). We were also somewhat regularly playing a homebrew Dungeons & Dragons campaign with a couple of Foreign Service friends.
Unfortunately, one of our pals had to leave us and report to a new assignment overseas. Although we were sad to see her go – especially so soon after her feisty rogue had wrestled that ogre zombie to the ground – and we felt that no one could truly replace her, I did start looking around for a new player to round out the group. Sooner than anticipated, I found a candidate.
Let's call him "Ben" (because that's his name). He was – and I believe still is – the boyfriend of one of my co-workers at World Market. Ben is a sharp guy with a quick wit and a wry sense of humor. After chatting with him a bit about the campaign and what type of character he might want to play, I thought he would be a good fit. I went over to his place once or twice to help get his character set up, back story and all, and he joined us for the next session.
Things went well; it seemed to me that everyone got along, though in-game the long-standing characters were a bit gruff toward Vargas (Ben's character), but generally I think it's to be expected that dungeon-exploring adventurers will be wary to accept an unknown newcomer into their midst until trust is earned. Ben didn't have a good way to get home as late at night as we tended to finish, so I had agreed to drive him home after each session. On the way, I asked him how he felt about the game and his response was positive. I spoke to him again a few days later when I saw him at World Market, and he seemed excited about the next session. On the drive home afterward, he again expressed enthusiasm.
I don't recall if it was after that session or if he had attended a third, but when I sent out my usual e-mail to coordinate the next session Ben didn't respond. I thought maybe he was experiencing Internet/computer difficulties, so I gave him a call. No answer. I needed his response, so I decided to shell out the 20¢ or whatever it would cost me to send him a text message. Both e-mail and text message went unanswered. No "Sorry, I can't make it." No "I'm not coming ever again." No "Fuck off and leave me alone." Absolutely nothing. Further, from that point on I didn't see even him at World Market where he had often met his girlfriend after her shift. I asked her what was up, and she said she didn't know.
To this day, I have never managed to reestablish communication with Ben (not that I've tried terribly hard since he won't respond), nor figure out what happened to cause him to bail out so completely and so abruptly. I've wracked my brain, replaying the last game session Ben attended in my mind countless times, searching for something someone (including me) said or did that could have offended him so much that he couldn't say one more word to me – ever.
Ben, if you're reading this: what happened? I really, truly, have no idea what we did – and I really want to know. Mostly so I can apologize (if necessary), but also because it's been eating away at a small corner of my mind for four years, and I think it will eventually drive me mad.
Let's all jump into the way-back machine and ride it to the spring of 2008. What were you doing then? Never mind, this is about me. I was living in the DC area with D-What, who was nearing the end of Mandarin Chinese language training at the Foreign Service Institute (I had dropped out of the same class in March, unable to keep up while I was also working nearly full time at the World Market at Pentagon Row – but still tested with a 1+/0+). We were also somewhat regularly playing a homebrew Dungeons & Dragons campaign with a couple of Foreign Service friends.
Unfortunately, one of our pals had to leave us and report to a new assignment overseas. Although we were sad to see her go – especially so soon after her feisty rogue had wrestled that ogre zombie to the ground – and we felt that no one could truly replace her, I did start looking around for a new player to round out the group. Sooner than anticipated, I found a candidate.
Let's call him "Ben" (because that's his name). He was – and I believe still is – the boyfriend of one of my co-workers at World Market. Ben is a sharp guy with a quick wit and a wry sense of humor. After chatting with him a bit about the campaign and what type of character he might want to play, I thought he would be a good fit. I went over to his place once or twice to help get his character set up, back story and all, and he joined us for the next session.
Things went well; it seemed to me that everyone got along, though in-game the long-standing characters were a bit gruff toward Vargas (Ben's character), but generally I think it's to be expected that dungeon-exploring adventurers will be wary to accept an unknown newcomer into their midst until trust is earned. Ben didn't have a good way to get home as late at night as we tended to finish, so I had agreed to drive him home after each session. On the way, I asked him how he felt about the game and his response was positive. I spoke to him again a few days later when I saw him at World Market, and he seemed excited about the next session. On the drive home afterward, he again expressed enthusiasm.
I don't recall if it was after that session or if he had attended a third, but when I sent out my usual e-mail to coordinate the next session Ben didn't respond. I thought maybe he was experiencing Internet/computer difficulties, so I gave him a call. No answer. I needed his response, so I decided to shell out the 20¢ or whatever it would cost me to send him a text message. Both e-mail and text message went unanswered. No "Sorry, I can't make it." No "I'm not coming ever again." No "Fuck off and leave me alone." Absolutely nothing. Further, from that point on I didn't see even him at World Market where he had often met his girlfriend after her shift. I asked her what was up, and she said she didn't know.
To this day, I have never managed to reestablish communication with Ben (not that I've tried terribly hard since he won't respond), nor figure out what happened to cause him to bail out so completely and so abruptly. I've wracked my brain, replaying the last game session Ben attended in my mind countless times, searching for something someone (including me) said or did that could have offended him so much that he couldn't say one more word to me – ever.
Ben, if you're reading this: what happened? I really, truly, have no idea what we did – and I really want to know. Mostly so I can apologize (if necessary), but also because it's been eating away at a small corner of my mind for four years, and I think it will eventually drive me mad.
3 comments:
Glad to have you back public... now more people can see my brilliant responses:)
Probably isn't about you. Dude could be flaky.
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